Stop grading with the answer key: Decisions and outcomes are not the same

Have you ever made a decision that felt right at the time, only to watch it turn out differently than you expected?

Most of us have.

Maybe it was a job that wasn't what you expected. A move that didn't solve the problem you hoped it would. A commitment you were excited about that ended up taking more than it gave back.

When that happens, we tend to put ourselves on trial.

We look at the outcome. We look at everything we know now. Then we use that information as evidence that we never should have made the decision in the first place.

But that's not a very fair trial.

Of course the answer seems obvious now. You know how the story ends.

The version of you making that decision didn't.

She was working with the information she had at the time. The facts, experiences, resources, and awareness available to her in that moment. That's all any of us ever get.

Yet so many of us use disappointing outcomes as evidence that we're bad decision-makers. And that makes it awfully tempting to doubt ourselves the next time a decision comes along.

The relationship ended, so our partner-picker is broken.
The new role wasn't a fit, so we should have known better.
The investment lost money, so maybe money is safest under the mattress.

Good, even great, decisions sometimes lead to disappointing outcomes. Bad decisions occasionally work out just fine.

A disappointing outcome doesn't mean you made a bad decision.

A good decision is one you made intentionally with the information, insight, and values you had at the time.

So you can stop Monday-morning quarterbacking your decisions and stop labeling yourself a "bad decision-maker."

Have your own back.

We certainly have yours.