How About This April Fools' Prank?: Many of our worries are no different than an April Fools' trick
That worry keeping you up at night? It's probably about something that hasn't even happened yet - and might never happen at all. Talk about fooling yourself!
On this April Fools' Day, let's talk about the biggest prank we play on ourselves: thinking we can accurately predict the future.
We spend countless hours fixated on future outcomes - "If my child fails this chemistry test, they'll never get into a good college" or "If I don't write the perfect note in this chart, I'll get sued."
When we worry about a future outcome, we're really just guessing. No amount of overthinking can predict what will actually happen. Yet somehow, we fool ourselves into believing that if we worry enough, we can either prepare for or prevent certain outcomes.
When you're feeling anxious, you can ask yourself:
What is this guess doing to me right now?
That guess about your child's future is likely causing you to feel panicky at this moment. That panic spreads to your child, creating arguments and disconnection - right now, in the present.
It's like wearing sunglasses on a cloudy day because you're certain it will be sunny later. Those sunglasses make it harder to see now, causing you to miss what's right in front of you - all because of a weather prediction that may never come true. And our guesses about the future have even less accuracy than the weather forecasts.
When you notice yourself attaching to a particular guess about the future, pause and ask:
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How does this make me feel right now?
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How do I act when I feel this way?
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If I could make any other guess about the future, how would that change how I am feeling now?
Have compassion for yourself - it's uncomfortable to face an unknown future. Sometimes with compassion, we don't even need to guess the outcome. You can meet your child, your patient, or yourself where you are right now and connect in ways that actually matter.
Simply noticing when you're guessing and treating it as certainty can be enough to stop the cycle and create space.
Save the tricks for the real April Fools’ day.